I was once married to a narcissist, and everything, everything , you communicate here is spot on. They are masters of camouflage . Eventually, their behavior reveals that the victim was a tool. I appreciate your comment about self forgiveness. Alas, they want their children to be trophies, and, as you say. The child I raised has severe ADHD and is on the autism spectrum. He is studying psychology in college; one day he comes home during break and says, “ My mom is a narcissist!”
Thanks so much Mark & for sharing your story. Sorry you had that experience. It is truly a hidden epidemic. Glad your son will be able to find answers you both need in his studies.
My mother was a narcissist who used suicide threats to emotionally rule her family.
As I am on the autistic spectrum with Asperger's, it made my life a nightmare -- she died on Friday the 13th of December, 2002, at 5:55 a.m., but I still have PTSD over it.
It was a nightmare from hell...wrecked my self-esteem.
Thanks you so much for sharing your story Kiwi. So sorry you had to go through that but credit to you for recognizing it and having the internal strength to work towards light.
Indeed it is very important for those who are ready to share their stories. I read 1000s in my studies which in the end helped me understand most common themes and variations. I did not have much AS insight before psychologically profiling Elon but there is a very important area of research that should be done on the negative effects of narcissists on their AS children and best practices for their children to overcome. I'm sure there is some but I don't recall a lot.
Well, I'm a court-certified expert in the subject.
My mother was the narcissist. My father was overwhelmed. He basically went down into the basement to work on his legendary antique typewriter collection and never came out.
I think we put his Tupperware bowl of cremains there after he died.
When we were cleaning out the brownstone prior to sale, my brother walked into a room and asked me, "Dave, have you seen Dad?"
Instinctively, I said, "He's probably lying on the couch in front of the TV set, taking a snooze, with Curry the cat on top of him.....ohhhhhhhhh, wait...."
I buried some of the ashes near the entrance to our house, so he could be near his granddaughter, and the rest are still in the Tupperware. I want to take my daughter to his old neighborhood in Washington Heights and Inwood in Manhattan to scatter them and teach her about her family history.
It happens to the best of us, yet succeeds best with the most uninformed among us—aka the alt-right Base in this moment. We can be aware, vigilant, yes. What of those unaware or helpless against the malignant tide? What is our role in creating a more flourishing society?
100%. Many answers to your questions are in the CNI library. We are certainly working towards creating a more flourishing society by taking on the psychology that got us here in the first place, so if you support this effort, you are doing something +. Obviously each person must do what works for them. Our immediate need is to crush the malignant narcissist trying to be President again or he will crush democracy to save his own skin. If you have not read the foundational piece trumpism is narcissism, that is a good place to start.
Still getting to that one Read…But I have been Resisting Trump since he announced in 2015. I did deep research on the Trump Family Background going back to his Grandfather…The Orange didn’t Fall Far From the Tree! I knew We were in for Trouble. In the 80’s when Trump was plastered all over the New York Tabloids his Ego was blasted out to the World, along with/his Lack of Morals!
AND the Putin/Kremlin component - Trump was the means to magnify/activate all the sleeper agents (in democracies around the world) and the people they had been Psy-Op'ing since the 60's (Khrushchev started it).
.. finding it intriguing to pause & or engage disciplined reread after paragraphs or paragraphs within specific groups - for introspection as well as consideration (looking way back toward my feral & adopted childhood.. or more recent related ‘scenarios which may exemplify signposts or ‘codes) - probably need a 3rd pass in daylight to jot down names / notes for further reflection - 3 AM toronto time here
Again - can more easily ‘visualize this via Current Canadian scenario of Pierre Poilievre - adopted at birth in Alberta - precocious Political dream as youth of being Prime Minister - competed among similar others in ‘Young Conservative’ University politics - changed adoptive name accordingly - had no life other than ‘politics’ - & now after 20 years has navigated among like minded individuals, dreamers & schemers as ‘conservative Vested Interest absorbed more Mainstream Media - has even changed physical appearance for more ‘warm & friendly appearance - gotten married & children (doting father emphasis)
To judge him by the company he keeps is the clear ‘tell’ - but even worse is examining his actual ‘reality these last 20 years ! He is simply & obviously revealed as ‘smartest guy in every room, sneering & arrogant - smart mouth as a whip repeating catchy slogan dogma & deceit - it’s also unclear how he’s become a multi millionaire - albeit been thriving on the taxpayers dime these last 20 years. He’s surrounded by like minded manipulative & corrupt ‘success stories’
In short - he’s a self made toxic apex parasite - a Lamprey Eel navigating within a Partisan political sub-Society - the antithesis of ‘Good Governance’. The Constituency that elected him as their Public Servant & mere flagstone on his pathway to Self Glory, Power & Dominion - his Wet Dream
I view him as the shining ‘Tool’ example of the Contemporary Propaganda Coup D’état - Capture The Media & The Palace Is Yours - de facto
Today he is propelled by Daily Popularity Polls proclaiming a historic Majority is his late autumn of 2025 - is this ringing any bells ? We now have Mainstream Media raving on How He Controls ‘The Narrative’ - Please keep in mind that in Canada - the Only People who can actually Vote for Pierre Poilievre are his Riding Constituency - 100,000 Eligible women & men - what I believe is underway is a type of Pre Fab Electoral ‘Construct’ or Distortion of Democracy - Yellow Media churning Social Media & both churning in a Looping Self Churning Cycle together - a new Self Propaganda Pandora’s Loop .. what th !! ?? 🦎🏴☠️
Here, by the 80's, Karl Rove was pushing ES&S voting and TALLY machines all over the country, updating as the technology advanced.
In 2014, a university in Oklahoma documented them flipping votes in '08, '10 and '12. Obama only won because they underestimated the number of votes to flip - it would have been 65/35. The same was not true for many down-ballot races, where Red won and no recounts were done.
They also documented Clues to identify fixed races:
- Paperless, or machine-printed ballots, vs. hand-marked paper that can be recounted.
- Certain results do not match exit polling (flipping is only done on certain races).
- Far-rt or evangelical candidates expected to lose, or close race. [Now, add Trump-Heritage supported.]
- GOP-passed legislation that says election officials can choose just one race to recount, rather than random recounting across all races. (CA did this.)
- Tally machine "crashes" around 11pm, and needs to be rebooted, after which various GOP candidates gradually catch up and win.
- The win is just a fraction of a percent, usually just above the automatic recount line.
- Far right election workers or technicians with access to Tally machine.
- Wifi or USB access (to tell it which races to flip).
Of course, these were the 'tells' 10-15 years ago. And we know they know about the Report, because it 'disappeared' online within a week or so, so they have had time to finesse the process. There are many who think, for example, that McConnell has had AT LEAST... one race flipped, maybe several, but no one knows, because recounts were not done.
I say THIS YEAR, we should RECOUNT EVERY RACE, EVERY PRECINCT across the nation.
Even red districts - they could increase the total vote by 50 here, a hundred there, to maximize the total vote count for state and national offices, as well as local takeover (e.g., the odd takeover of SO many school boards, sheriffs and county councils, the past decade or so...)
I'm sure the republican voters would agree, because, via Projection, they are told all the ways that cheating is happening, just that Dems are doing it. (HA!)
...McConnell has had AT LEAST... one race flipped, maybe several, but no one knows, because recounts were not done.
I say THIS YEAR, we should RECOUNT EVERY RACE, EVERY PRECINCT across the nation.
Even red districts - they could increase the total vote by 50 here, a hundred there, to maximize the total vote count for state and national offices, as well as local takeover (e.g., the odd takeover of SO many school boards, sheriffs and county councils, the past decade or so...)
I'm sure the republican voters would agree, because, via Projection, they are told all the ways that cheating is happening, just that Dems are doing it. (HA!)
...McConnell has had AT LEAST one race flipped, maybe several, but no one knows, because recounts were not done.
I say THIS YEAR, we should RECOUNT EVERY RACE, EVERY PRECINCT across the nation.
Even red districts - they could increase the total vote by 50 here, a hundred there, to maximize the total vote count for state and national offices, as well as local takeover (e.g., the odd takeover of SO many school boards, sheriffs and county councils, the past decade or so...)
I'm sure the republican voters would agree, because, via Projection, they are told all the ways that cheating is happening, just that Dems are doing it. (HA!)
Had to look up “Love Bombing and Virtue Signaling”…Interesting!
Question for you Sam…In your opinion, What is the best way to respond to a Love Bomber when you suspect one has targeted you, or someone w/you…? Confrontation, satire, reverse psychology, or just Blowing them off…?
I know some people w the resources and influence who will try to make a change of the Democratic nominee but I think that’s a fool errand and this is the way to go: dumb it down a little, find a catch phrase, anything to grab the attention of those who might see this “Big Con”. I’m hoping Judge Engoron’s huge judgement for business fraud will begin to move the needle a bit.
I’m a Progressive Democrat and have been not-so-pleased with/Biden’s Moderate Stance (Allot could have been done in his 1st. 2 years that would have had profound Changes for Our Democracy (Enlarging SCOTUS for one) but alas, it wasn’t yet to be! As frustrated as I’ve been, I will still vote for Biden again! THERE IS NO OTHER PATH! Weather Trump makes it IF he is found Guilty of Any of his 91 Felonies Is Still Up In The Air…BUT ANY GOP NOMINEE WILL STILL SUPPORT “TRUMPISSIM”! All 3rd. Party Candidates are a Vote for the GOP (Gold Only Party) Project 2025 and /or 7 Mountains. The 1 Thing I’m Positive About is…FEAR THE FEMALE VOTE! We Vote w/Our Uterus…! FACT.
I was once married to a narcissist, and everything, everything , you communicate here is spot on. They are masters of camouflage . Eventually, their behavior reveals that the victim was a tool. I appreciate your comment about self forgiveness. Alas, they want their children to be trophies, and, as you say. The child I raised has severe ADHD and is on the autism spectrum. He is studying psychology in college; one day he comes home during break and says, “ My mom is a narcissist!”
Thanks so much Mark & for sharing your story. Sorry you had that experience. It is truly a hidden epidemic. Glad your son will be able to find answers you both need in his studies.
Thanks, Sam. My son is finding peace through his studies.
My mother was a narcissist who used suicide threats to emotionally rule her family.
As I am on the autistic spectrum with Asperger's, it made my life a nightmare -- she died on Friday the 13th of December, 2002, at 5:55 a.m., but I still have PTSD over it.
It was a nightmare from hell...wrecked my self-esteem.
Thanks you so much for sharing your story Kiwi. So sorry you had to go through that but credit to you for recognizing it and having the internal strength to work towards light.
I have a substack post on it: Mathematics and Me (He Could Solve for X But Did Not Know Y) which has more detail on this life-defining subject.
Indeed it is very important for those who are ready to share their stories. I read 1000s in my studies which in the end helped me understand most common themes and variations. I did not have much AS insight before psychologically profiling Elon but there is a very important area of research that should be done on the negative effects of narcissists on their AS children and best practices for their children to overcome. I'm sure there is some but I don't recall a lot.
Well, I'm a court-certified expert in the subject.
My mother was the narcissist. My father was overwhelmed. He basically went down into the basement to work on his legendary antique typewriter collection and never came out.
I think we put his Tupperware bowl of cremains there after he died.
When we were cleaning out the brownstone prior to sale, my brother walked into a room and asked me, "Dave, have you seen Dad?"
Instinctively, I said, "He's probably lying on the couch in front of the TV set, taking a snooze, with Curry the cat on top of him.....ohhhhhhhhh, wait...."
I buried some of the ashes near the entrance to our house, so he could be near his granddaughter, and the rest are still in the Tupperware. I want to take my daughter to his old neighborhood in Washington Heights and Inwood in Manhattan to scatter them and teach her about her family history.
Fantastic read. Looking forward to the next article. Thank you!
Thanks so much Jasmine!
You're welcome 😊
✨Excellent, thorough article. A must read for everyone ! Thank you, Sam. ✨
Thanks so much Harry!
Sounds awesome. Can’t wait to dive in and learn more. 👍😎
It happens to the best of us, yet succeeds best with the most uninformed among us—aka the alt-right Base in this moment. We can be aware, vigilant, yes. What of those unaware or helpless against the malignant tide? What is our role in creating a more flourishing society?
100%. Many answers to your questions are in the CNI library. We are certainly working towards creating a more flourishing society by taking on the psychology that got us here in the first place, so if you support this effort, you are doing something +. Obviously each person must do what works for them. Our immediate need is to crush the malignant narcissist trying to be President again or he will crush democracy to save his own skin. If you have not read the foundational piece trumpism is narcissism, that is a good place to start.
Still getting to that one Read…But I have been Resisting Trump since he announced in 2015. I did deep research on the Trump Family Background going back to his Grandfather…The Orange didn’t Fall Far From the Tree! I knew We were in for Trouble. In the 80’s when Trump was plastered all over the New York Tabloids his Ego was blasted out to the World, along with/his Lack of Morals!
AND the Putin/Kremlin component - Trump was the means to magnify/activate all the sleeper agents (in democracies around the world) and the people they had been Psy-Op'ing since the 60's (Khrushchev started it).
.. finding it intriguing to pause & or engage disciplined reread after paragraphs or paragraphs within specific groups - for introspection as well as consideration (looking way back toward my feral & adopted childhood.. or more recent related ‘scenarios which may exemplify signposts or ‘codes) - probably need a 3rd pass in daylight to jot down names / notes for further reflection - 3 AM toronto time here
Again - can more easily ‘visualize this via Current Canadian scenario of Pierre Poilievre - adopted at birth in Alberta - precocious Political dream as youth of being Prime Minister - competed among similar others in ‘Young Conservative’ University politics - changed adoptive name accordingly - had no life other than ‘politics’ - & now after 20 years has navigated among like minded individuals, dreamers & schemers as ‘conservative Vested Interest absorbed more Mainstream Media - has even changed physical appearance for more ‘warm & friendly appearance - gotten married & children (doting father emphasis)
To judge him by the company he keeps is the clear ‘tell’ - but even worse is examining his actual ‘reality these last 20 years ! He is simply & obviously revealed as ‘smartest guy in every room, sneering & arrogant - smart mouth as a whip repeating catchy slogan dogma & deceit - it’s also unclear how he’s become a multi millionaire - albeit been thriving on the taxpayers dime these last 20 years. He’s surrounded by like minded manipulative & corrupt ‘success stories’
In short - he’s a self made toxic apex parasite - a Lamprey Eel navigating within a Partisan political sub-Society - the antithesis of ‘Good Governance’. The Constituency that elected him as their Public Servant & mere flagstone on his pathway to Self Glory, Power & Dominion - his Wet Dream
I view him as the shining ‘Tool’ example of the Contemporary Propaganda Coup D’état - Capture The Media & The Palace Is Yours - de facto
Today he is propelled by Daily Popularity Polls proclaiming a historic Majority is his late autumn of 2025 - is this ringing any bells ? We now have Mainstream Media raving on How He Controls ‘The Narrative’ - Please keep in mind that in Canada - the Only People who can actually Vote for Pierre Poilievre are his Riding Constituency - 100,000 Eligible women & men - what I believe is underway is a type of Pre Fab Electoral ‘Construct’ or Distortion of Democracy - Yellow Media churning Social Media & both churning in a Looping Self Churning Cycle together - a new Self Propaganda Pandora’s Loop .. what th !! ?? 🦎🏴☠️
Thanks for sharing your story Thomas. You definitely put this guy on my radar.
I added some context above for you both.
An additional factor to consider:
Here, by the 80's, Karl Rove was pushing ES&S voting and TALLY machines all over the country, updating as the technology advanced.
In 2014, a university in Oklahoma documented them flipping votes in '08, '10 and '12. Obama only won because they underestimated the number of votes to flip - it would have been 65/35. The same was not true for many down-ballot races, where Red won and no recounts were done.
They also documented Clues to identify fixed races:
- Paperless, or machine-printed ballots, vs. hand-marked paper that can be recounted.
- Certain results do not match exit polling (flipping is only done on certain races).
- Far-rt or evangelical candidates expected to lose, or close race. [Now, add Trump-Heritage supported.]
- GOP-passed legislation that says election officials can choose just one race to recount, rather than random recounting across all races. (CA did this.)
- Tally machine "crashes" around 11pm, and needs to be rebooted, after which various GOP candidates gradually catch up and win.
- The win is just a fraction of a percent, usually just above the automatic recount line.
- Far right election workers or technicians with access to Tally machine.
- Wifi or USB access (to tell it which races to flip).
Of course, these were the 'tells' 10-15 years ago. And we know they know about the Report, because it 'disappeared' online within a week or so, so they have had time to finesse the process. There are many who think, for example, that McConnell has had AT LEAST... one race flipped, maybe several, but no one knows, because recounts were not done.
I say THIS YEAR, we should RECOUNT EVERY RACE, EVERY PRECINCT across the nation.
Even red districts - they could increase the total vote by 50 here, a hundred there, to maximize the total vote count for state and national offices, as well as local takeover (e.g., the odd takeover of SO many school boards, sheriffs and county councils, the past decade or so...)
I'm sure the republican voters would agree, because, via Projection, they are told all the ways that cheating is happening, just that Dems are doing it. (HA!)
2/
...McConnell has had AT LEAST... one race flipped, maybe several, but no one knows, because recounts were not done.
I say THIS YEAR, we should RECOUNT EVERY RACE, EVERY PRECINCT across the nation.
Even red districts - they could increase the total vote by 50 here, a hundred there, to maximize the total vote count for state and national offices, as well as local takeover (e.g., the odd takeover of SO many school boards, sheriffs and county councils, the past decade or so...)
I'm sure the republican voters would agree, because, via Projection, they are told all the ways that cheating is happening, just that Dems are doing it. (HA!)
/2
...McConnell has had AT LEAST one race flipped, maybe several, but no one knows, because recounts were not done.
I say THIS YEAR, we should RECOUNT EVERY RACE, EVERY PRECINCT across the nation.
Even red districts - they could increase the total vote by 50 here, a hundred there, to maximize the total vote count for state and national offices, as well as local takeover (e.g., the odd takeover of SO many school boards, sheriffs and county councils, the past decade or so...)
I'm sure the republican voters would agree, because, via Projection, they are told all the ways that cheating is happening, just that Dems are doing it. (HA!)
wow
Had to look up “Love Bombing and Virtue Signaling”…Interesting!
Question for you Sam…In your opinion, What is the best way to respond to a Love Bomber when you suspect one has targeted you, or someone w/you…? Confrontation, satire, reverse psychology, or just Blowing them off…?
I know some people w the resources and influence who will try to make a change of the Democratic nominee but I think that’s a fool errand and this is the way to go: dumb it down a little, find a catch phrase, anything to grab the attention of those who might see this “Big Con”. I’m hoping Judge Engoron’s huge judgement for business fraud will begin to move the needle a bit.
I’m a Progressive Democrat and have been not-so-pleased with/Biden’s Moderate Stance (Allot could have been done in his 1st. 2 years that would have had profound Changes for Our Democracy (Enlarging SCOTUS for one) but alas, it wasn’t yet to be! As frustrated as I’ve been, I will still vote for Biden again! THERE IS NO OTHER PATH! Weather Trump makes it IF he is found Guilty of Any of his 91 Felonies Is Still Up In The Air…BUT ANY GOP NOMINEE WILL STILL SUPPORT “TRUMPISSIM”! All 3rd. Party Candidates are a Vote for the GOP (Gold Only Party) Project 2025 and /or 7 Mountains. The 1 Thing I’m Positive About is…FEAR THE FEMALE VOTE! We Vote w/Our Uterus…! FACT.